To be considered WORTHY of love and acceptance, how was the individual conditioned to BE or to Behave?

What were they encouraged TO DO to be Lovable?

When approaching an adult or a child, using a Trauma-Informed approach, one of the things that we need to consider, when trying to understand what they’re saying or doing, or how their attitude to a person or creature; to an experience; or to themselves; evolved is what they were CONDITIONED TO BELIEVE a person needs to do, to achieve, to believe or to embody, to be regarded as ‘acceptance-worthy’ or ‘love-worthy’

I elaborate further in this short video:

If you have questions or comments, or if you’d like assistance, applying this analysis to your specific circumstances, then please get in touch with me using the contact information at or by booking an introductory session online, in-person, or by phone through

Philip Be’er

Supporting clients through the Dark Nights of their Soul

Author of “Learning to Love – Your Guide to Personal Empowerment!”